I’ve been wanting to write my feelings about a sad moment in my life and I have been working up the courage to do so. Besides my great-grandpa passing away when I was young, I have been spared from the heartache of losing a loved one as I’ve grown older. Back in November, I felt that heartache.
Taylor’s papaw passed away after having a stroke. Now, you might think: it’s not so bad since he wasn’t my related-by-blood grandpa. But I tell you what… Taylor’s entire family on both of his parent’s sides have loved and accepted me, especially papaw and mamaw Fultz. It seems like from the very beginning of our relationship the two of them (especially mamaw) have said “Oh, you’re going to get married one day”. The two of them have always made me feel so loved and welcomed into their family. I feel so blessed to have that.
I try my hardest to cherish the moments I get to spend with my parents. As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned how important that is. I always thought while growing up that my parents were invincible and they would always be there in my life. I think as you get older you learn it’s important to cherish those precious moments because we realize we will all leave this earth one day. With that being said, I also know we will all be together in everlasting life. Nonetheless, it still doesn’t take away the pain and heartache that comes with death at that moment in time.
I’ve been listening to songs and praying a lot for those in my family who have experienced this loss. As I write this, I’m being challenged to hold back tears. This one song, one that I’ve listened to countless times before, has more meaning to me in my life now. One of my favorite artists, Jack Johnson, has a song called “If I Could”. He sings about the fact that his friend has two weeks to live and if he could, he would give his friend more time to live. These lyrics carry so much meaning:
They say that new life makes losin’ life easier to understand
Words are kind they help ease the mind I miss my old friend
And though you gotta go we’ll keep a piece of your soul
One goes out, one comes in
Jack’s song reminds me that when new life is created and brought into this world, it’s such a beautiful thing. A precious life goes out while this new life comes in to fill that void. As I keep pieces of the souls of those who I have loved and lost, I’m comforted in knowing that I will see them again one day.
No amount of time can heal the pain that we feel. We’ll always hold their spirits and memories close in our hearts, along with the feeling of their absence. While this earthly loss is difficult, by His grace, we will meet our loved ones again in Heaven.